Download Ebook The New Topping Book
Download Ebook The New Topping Book
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The New Topping Book
Download Ebook The New Topping Book
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From the Publisher
Dossie Easton is a licensed Marriage, Family and Child Counselor who specializes in the concerns of people with alternative sexualities. A lesbian bottom, she has been active in the S/M scene since the early 1960s.
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About the Author
Dossie Easton is a licensed Marriage, Family and Child Counselor who specializes in the concerns of people with alternative sexualities. A lesbian bottom, she has been active in the S/M scene since the early 1960s.
Read more
Product details
Paperback: 200 pages
Publisher: Greenery Press; 2nd edition (July 2003)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1890159360
ISBN-13: 978-1890159368
Product Dimensions:
8 x 0.5 x 6 inches
Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.3 out of 5 stars
136 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#169,876 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
This is NOT a How To Manual but rather real-life anecdotes showing the sensations, feelings, meaning and power one can experience through a BDSM exchange, scene or practice.I love understanding why people do what they do. It is easy to describe what a sexual practice or relationship looks like in terms of external appearances and customs and those things are covered by many other books. This gives a VERY thoughtful, intimate and personal description of the way the authors and others experience being a “bottom†in a bdsm exchange, i.e., the one generally in a receiving role in a scene.The authors explain some of the reasons *why* and how these exchanges can be transformative, healing & spiritual and of course mention the more commonly known reasons, such as enjoyment!I highly recommend this if you are trying to understand the appeal and some of the emotional and psychological cautions and possible outcomes and safety issues.
it's a good book in its own right, it just wasn't what I was looking for. It seems geared more toward those that know nothing or have apprehensions/misconceptions about the scene. The Dom do's and don'ts this book is not. It is closer to an extended essay on the division of power within a dom/sub relationship. If you're looking to better understand the emotional side of dom/sub relationships then this is a good starting point.
My husband and I are new to Bottoming and Topping so I bought this book expecting, I don’t know, some how-tos. But it isn’t an instruction manual per se ( though there is plenty of food info); it is more explaining this new world to me and discussing much more articulately that I can express how the practice of BDSM is strengthening our connection and deepening our connection even when we are not “in sceneâ€. Highly recommend.
I didn’t enjoy the judgemental tone of the book. They seem to be promoting a specific style of submission, because other ways of being don’t make the author “wet.â€There are useful paragraphs about communication and boundaries, but nothing you’d need to purchase a book over. It’s definitely geared towards people who have multiple partners, also.
Every now and then, over the course of the year and a quarter that I've been exploring BDSM, I've stumbled across a perfect gem: an author who voices my own unspoken thoughts more clearly than I ever thought possible. Having spent over two decades ashamed of my own need and ultimately isolated from my sexuality, I cannot overstate the value of these little glimpses into other minds that think like mine. Polly Peachum's lovely essay "The Fragrant Dust" leaves me exhilarated and stunned with recognition. Miria Hunter and Yaldah Tovah have written some of the finest essays you'll ever read on the dynamics of consensual Master/slave relationships and the psychology of submission.Perhaps it was a mistake to pick up "The New Bottoming Book" looking for more of the same. After all, such a perfect meeting of the minds is a rare thing. I've learned from and enjoyed plenty of articles that weren't entirely on my wavelength. But here was a whole book on the experience of bottoming, a book that professes on page 1 to be "a celebration of sensational submissives and marvelous masochists . . . of those who love to struggle and serve and scream and submit . . . of bottoms, submissives, captives, slaves, pets and all the beautiful recipients who ever peopled a kinky imagination." I hoped that here was a book that would help me understand my own sometimes mystifying needs and desires.And there were some passages in the book that did exactly that. There's a list in Chapter 2 of emotions that a person might wish to experience in-scene, and along with such expected items as "helplessness," "lust," "humiliation," and "being nurtured," I was pleasantly astonished to discover "martyrdom," "pathos," "resentment," "sadness." Rarely, if ever, had I seen such emotions treated as potentially normal and desirable parts of the BDSM experience, and yet they figured often in my fantasies as part of an essentially cathartic psychodrama. Obviously, seeing as how Easton and Hardy saw fit to include them in the list, there are other people who have the same needs I do to venture into the realm of quiet, dark emotions.Unfortunately, such moments of joyous connection were rare. Through most of the book I had the disconcerting feeling that I was waiting for something that was just out of reach, promised and even sampled, but never actually attained. I wanted to read about the psychology of submission, while the authors seemed more focused on the erotic thrills of play. Easton and Hardy seem to expect their readers to engage in scenes of limited duration, with a variety of partners, for the purpose of mutual erotic gratification. If you're involved in, or looking for, a relationship based on total power exchange, internal enslavement, and/or consensual nonconsent, you won't find much of use in these pages beyond what you'd get in any general-interest BDSM book (there are a handful of references to 24/7 D/s in these pages, but ultimately nothing of substance). If you enjoy playing at being a slave, you'll love this book. If you really want to BE a slave, the constant focus on YOUR rights, YOUR power, YOUR gratification, may be more than a little disconcerting.I could easily have given this book four stars, in spite of its flaws. After all, it is presented, according to the title at least, as a guide to bottoming, not to submission or enslavement. There are far more play bottoms or part-timers out there than there are dedicated 24/7 lifestylers, and Easton and Hardy might well be commended for sticking to what they know rather than trying to tackle a topic with which neither has any particular experience (both authors are switches, and Hardy actually leans more to the "top" end of the spectrum). However, since one of the purposes of this book is to help novice bottoms accept themselves, I couldn't quite forgive a couple of brief passages that actually seem to disparage 24/7 relationships. On page 30, Easton and Hardy tell us that "[t]he desire you may have to be utterly bottom, to be operated by and operated on by another, to be very small, to be owned . . . is not reasonable." I found this very disturbing, as did several of my friends. After struggling for years with this strange and shameful desire to be truly and profoundly owned, the last thing we need is to be told by our fellow BDSM'ers that we're irrational and unreasonable. I read this sentence with only a twinge of uncertainty and a great deal of annoyance, but if I had picked up this book a year earlier, I likely would have come away from it in despair that I was disturbingly deviant even by the standards of folks who like to wear leather and hang out in dungeons.If you are a play bottom, this might be the most useful book you'll ever read. If you're a slave at heart, however, although you may find a few valuable nuggets scattered among these pages, I definitely recommend that you begin your literary explorations elsewhere.
Well written. I hope all the newbies who think Fifty Shades of Grey is a how-to manual actually read this.
Excellent information that every Dom/Top should also read. Great down to earth explanations, along with "Topping" these will round out your understanding of the many ways you can enjoy BDSM with others. Excellent.
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